Dare to be free

I went to my church's young adult retreat (they call it a summit) this past weekend. It was good; I feel like I received some good "spiritual food". The theme particularly spoke to me: Dare to be Free. I probably don't need to tell you that, despite me living in a country that has given me freedom, I still feel chained. Chained to other people's expectations of me; chained to hurts in my past, etc.. But I feel like I was able to find release from those chains this past weekend.

In particular, I have been reminded of my incomplete viewpoint of God. Last Wednesday, I was talking with my pastor and we were discussing how I hear God's voice. How does He speak to me? What does He say? I was sharing that for the most part, I hear God telling me that I should be doing this, or not doing that, etc.. At that point, it occurred to me that I almost never experience God's pleasure, His delight, His joy over me. The problem isn't from the fact that He doesn't tell me these things, but that I cannot hear them. This is my incomplete viewpoint of God. I lack the ability to know that God is proud of me, that He's pleased with me, that He looks forward to spending time with me, just as any good father would. This most likely explains why it is so hard for me to be disciplined about spending time with God. If it's just a duty, the motivation to do it doesn't last. But if it's a delight, the motivation comes automatically.

So anyways, I received prayer from different people, that I would be free from feeling guilty that I do this or don't do that for God, so that I could enjoy God and more easily grow closer to Him. True freedom.

July 4th was fun; just relaxed and played Settlers of Catan with some friends. I'm really getting people hooked on that game.